


What Wouldn't We Do

by EllBoots



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-07
Updated: 2014-05-13
Packaged: 2018-01-23 21:48:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1580687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllBoots/pseuds/EllBoots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set sometime after S12E02. Kimball calls a meeting for her new Captains. Tucker is impatient, Grif and Simmons have a secret, and Caboose is... Caboose. It's the news they've been waiting to hear.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wake up call

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic i've written in a really long while, so go easy! It's set after Tucker steals the flash drive from the fed base in S12E02. It was originally just going to be the first chapter, but when I started writing I thought i'd like to maybe carry on and get to the actual rescue! That is, until canon catches up =P

Tucker was, to put it lightly, pissed off. He thought that, of all of them, he could count on Simmons to be on time to meetings. Grif hadn't been there either, but that hardly came as a surprise. He'd left Caboose with Kimball to go find them both, she insisted the meeting was important but refused to tell the Blues before the Red captains had arrived. He figured it would be safe, Caboose didn't have any weapons on him and Kimball still didn't quite know how to deal with Caboose, sometimes she obviously just wanted to scream at him like she did the rest of them but there was something, Tucker guessed it was his childlike nature, that was endearing to her. He probably reminded her of some of her younger troops, so she tended to go a little easier on him, and offered help to him more than the others. Tucker had once walked in to her office to find Caboose talking to her about Church. Hearing Caboose talk about Church always felt like a grenade to the chest for Tucker, all the hurt and anger came rushing back to him leaving him spiraling. He could have sworn he'd heard Kimball sniffling beneath her helmet before he knocked gingerly on the door. There was just something about Caboose, he thought to himself, no matter how much you wanted to hate him for his stupidity, there was an innocence to him that drew people. No one could bear to see him upset. Anger rushed up again in Tucker's chest again as he remembered Church; Church calling them problems in the Hologram Chamber; Church leaving them to help Carolina without a thought for his friends; Church leaving them again without so much as a goodbye-- but Tucker choked it down, Church wasn't his priority right now.

He made his way down the grimy corridors of the New Republic towards the captains’ dormitories. The base really was a sad sight to behold. Tucker thought wistfully of Blood Gulch, Valhalla, even their shitty temporary base in the canyon, at least they all had felt like home. Now, with so many team members missing, the ramshackle base felt even darker. That was partially the reason that Tucker was so pissed off with Simmons and Grif- he was fairly sure that, although she refused to admit it, Kimball had finally decoded the flash drive he had stolen from the Fed outpost Felix had blown to hell and they might have a clue where Washington and the rest were being held by Locus. The thought of it made his heart jump into his throat.

Despite the tirade he'd thrown Kimball's way about refusing to tell them without everyone there, he could understand why. Every day for the past two weeks Tucker had been in her office asking after her progress, and every time she'd told him that she would let him know when she was done. Well, she did for the first few days. Her responses became more similar to "Just get the fuck out, Tucker!" as the days wore on. Something told him that Kimball knew if she gave just Tucker the information he would run off on the rescue mission without waiting for the others, or formulating a proper plan. And unfortunately, he knew she was right. There was no way he could wait any longer. The base he got the flash drive from had been blown to smithereens, but he was still worried. What if Locus had managed to find out the information that had been downloaded before the place blew? He knew it was unlikely, if not impossible, that Locus would have had the time to extract the data- he was out fighting with the rest of his troops, but the thought still scared Tucker. If Locus knew what information they had they could have moved Wash already, even if not he might have moved them guessing at the information they took. Tucker shook his head, telling himself not to think like that, not that it would stop him anyway.

He reached the outside of Simmons’s room. Grif’s was further down the corridor, but he figured that would be an easier job with some back up. He knocked on Simmons door, loudly enough to wake him up and hopefully to convey his annoyance, too. He immediately heard confused scuffling inside, then Simmons’s voice saying “Oh shit, is that the time?!”

“Yeah Simmons, that’s the fucking time.” Tucker called through the closed door.

“…Shit.” He heard Simmons say. He sounded scared. _Damn right_ , thought Tucker with a sniff. He crossed his arms and listened to the commotion behind the door. Simmons was making a hell of a lot of noise getting dressed, Tucker could hear a mantra of “Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.” coming from the room. Tucker began to tap his foot; although he new Simmons couldn’t see him he thought it might help speed up the process. He even pursed his lips behind his helmet, just for good measure. Finally, Simmons opened the door with his helmet under his arm.

“Yeah, about time,” said Tucker with perhaps more vehemence than he intended, “Do you have any idea how important this meeting could be, Simmons? And today is the one day you choose to sleep in?” Simmons blushed deeply, and looked down at his feet. Tucker continued to glare at him until he felt the message had set in.

“Alright,” he sighed, “Let’s go get Captain Lazy-Fucking-Asshole.” For some reason this made Simmons blush even deeper, and it seemed like he was trying to bury himself further inside his maroon armor. Tucker shot a confused look at him.

“Dude, what is up with you today?”

“Nothing!” Simmons squeaked in the way he usually only reserved for trying to speak to women. Tucker started to ask again what his problem was again but Simmons had taken off down the corridor in the direction of Kimball’s office, his head still down and nervously half-jogging.

“Hey asshole, I need your help waking up Grif!” Tucker called after him, but the only response he got was Simmons breaking into a run and another strangled squeak that relayed how uncomfortable he was.

“What the fuck?” Tucker asked the air, seriously worried about Simmons’s behavior. Just then, he heard Simmons’s door open again and jumped back. Grif slid out from behind the door, already fully dressed in his orange armor. He had his hands clasped in front of him and shuffled nervously as the heavy door clanged shut behind him, impossibly loud in the awkward silence of the corridor. Grif and Tucker held each other’s gaze for a long moment, Tucker’s brain not quite working fast enough to comprehend what had happened. Grif coughed nervously before sliding past Tucker and taking off after Simmons. Tucker stood completely still for at least another two minutes before raising a hand and opening his mouth to speak. After another thirty seconds stuck in that position he finally managed to get some words out:

“What… the fuck?”


	2. The Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally all the captains arrive at the meeting. Kimball has important news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little shorter, but I thought i'd prefer to upload what I had rather than wait =)

Tucker came through the door to Kimball’s office. Caboose was in the seat where he’d left him, hands clasped on his lap and humming softly. Simmons had taken a chair in the corner and his helmeted head was in his hands as if he couldn’t bear to look at anyone in the room. Grif was stood up next to him, arms crossed and very deliberately not looking at Tucker as he entered the room. Kimball raised an eyebrow at Tucker as he shut the door; she was sitting behind her desk with her helmet off.

“Thank you for joining us Captain Tucker.” She said, but there was more confusion that malice in her voice. Tucker nodded with a muted “Sorry.” Kimball shook her head; obviously deciding she should start the already-delayed meeting rather than question the odd actions of her captains.

“Okay, men. I’m sure you’ve all guessed why I’ve called this meeting, even if the majority of you couldn’t be bothered to turn up on time for it,” she began, shooting a glare in the direction of the corner where Simmons and Grif were based. Tucker saw Simmons bury his face even further into his hands, he was sure that under his helmet his face was bright red. Grif just shuffled nervously. Kimball took a deep breath and continued, “We decoded the information from the flash drive.”

Everyone looked up, even Simmons. Grif uncrossed his arms and Tucker heard Caboose gasp softly.

“Now we need to approach this information carefully-“

“Where are they?” Tucker cut her off with a hand on the desk and a voice he could barely keep in check. Yes, he had guessed the purpose of the meeting, but hearing it from Kimball’s mouth was different. His heart was in his throat and he could barely hear Kimball’s response over the blood rushing around his head.

“Tucker,” Kimball said sharply, “We have to approach the information _carefully_ ,” she repeated.

“No, Kimball!” Kimball’s eyebrows shot up and Tucker realised he had shouted, “Sorry…” he mumbled, “It’s just we’ve waited this long. We don’t have the time to sit around and be careful! We have no idea what’s happening to them in there, no idea if they’ve been moved or if they’re even alive! We need to act fast, or there was no point in taking the data in the first place.” Cunningham and Rogers flashed through Tucker’s mind at the thought of that day but he pushed them away. The nightmares were enough of a reminder; he couldn’t have them haunting his waking moments, too.

“Tucker, I know how you must be feeling,” Kimball was being uncharacteristically gentle with him, almost like she was with Caboose, “I know how all of you must be feeling,” she said, casting her gaze around the room, “But the fact is if we don’t act on this information with a high degree of caution, we may never get the chance again,” she deliberately caught Tucker’s eye, silently reminding him of the consequences reckless actions could bring. Tucker took his hand from the desk and lent away, knowing she was right.

“The flash drive contained a list of locations that the Feds are currently using to hold New Republic soldiers. This in itself is very useful information,” she paused for a moment before quietly saying, “Thank you, Captain Tucker,” Tucker’s head jerked up in surprise. He remembered how Kimball had screamed at him the day he got the drive, him and Felix both, how small he had felt knowing his selfishness had cost the lives of two of his teammates, and her soldiers. It slightly lessened the pain of the experience to know it wasn’t just his friends that could be helped with the information he had received, although it did nothing to soften the guilt.

“Now the guards you overhead mentioned Agent Washington being held in the city, correct?” Tucker nodded, “Well, there are currently three prisons there. We have no idea which one Agent Washington is in, or if Sarge and Private Donut are in the same place as he is. With your permission, captains, I’d like to send out groups of spies to keep watch on the three buildings and see which one looks the most likely to hold high-priority prisoners. I can fly them out later today so with any luck they’ll reach the city by nightfall. It’ll be dangerous, but it’s the only way to discern where your friends are and as I said, we might only get one shot. Your thoughts?”

Tucker took a minute to absorb the information. As much as he wanted to hijack a Pelican and get the rescues mission underway that second, he knew Kimball was right, they needed more information before they could act.  His stomach was squirming uncomfortably knowing Wash was inside one of the three buildings marked out on the map on Kimball’s desk, and yet he couldn’t do anything to help. It wasn’t in Tucker’s nature to sit still, especially when his friends were in danger. And, he’d realized, especially when Wash was in danger. He’d seen Grif and Simmons turn to each other and talk quietly, and when Tucker looked down to his left he saw Caboose staring up at him, waiting for his response.

“What do you think, Caboose?” he asked quietly.

“Oh! Well I, uh. I think it is a good plan!” Caboose said, still with less of his usual vigor. Tucker smiled,

“Me too, buddy.” out of the corner of his eye, Tucker saw Kimball glance up in surprise; “Hey Reds, you got any problems with the plan?” he called.

“Uh… no. No, we think it’s good.” Grif replied, Simmons apparently still too distraught to interact with anyone in the room.

“Well, that’s settled then!” said Kimball, not bothering to hide her surprise that it had been so easy to convince Tucker to stay put, “I’ll send the reconnaissance teams out now, you go debrief your teams on what’s happening. We’ll be upping drills for the next few days; we need your guys ready for when the intel comes through.” For once, no one complained, not even Grif, “Okay… Dismissed.” 


	3. Friends Like These

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The teams are debriefed. Tucker wants answers from Grif. Caboose is still Caboose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3! Again, not especially long, hopefully chapter 4 will be up soon =)

Tucker had been uncomfortable with his troops ever since Cunningham and Rogers. The new guys, Evans and Lorne, seemed just as unfailingly loyal as the rest of them, willing to follow Tucker’s ever order. Palomo had grown something resembling a backbone after the incident, which Tucker was, perhaps surprisingly, grateful for. It helped Tucker to have someone close who he knew blamed him for the deaths of his friends. It kept him grounded. It meant he didn’t get swept up in the frankly ridiculous hero-worship some of the other soldiers piled on him. Tucker knew he wasn’t a hero. He needed Palomo to keep reminding him of that.

He coughed lightly, “Okay, men,” they stood to attention, sloppily but enthusiastically, “Reconnaissance teams have been sent to study three Fed buildings where they keep prisoners, possibly including my friends,” he paused for a second, “From this moment we are entering intensive training with Gold, Red and Blue team to prepare you for the upcoming rescue mission. Do you all understand?”

“Yes, sir!” came the response.

“Uh, sir?” Palomo’s voice piped up.

“Yes, Lieutenant?” Tucker couldn’t bring himself to be hard on the kid any more, not after what he’d done to him.

“What’s our team name going to be?” he inquired.

“Oh… uh…” He hadn’t thought of that. He quietly cursed the Tucker from over a decade ago who had picked this stupid, ambiguous armor.

“Well, it’s mint, right?” chirped Lorne.

“Team Mint sounds fucking dumb. Team Turquoise?” Evans chimed in.

“Oh yeah, because Team fucking Turquoise doesn’t sound dumb _at all_.”

“Oh shut the fuck up, _Team Mint—_ “

“It’s Aqua, right sir?” interjected Palomo, breaking up the argument.

“Uh, yes Lieutenant. Thank you.” Tucker gratefully replied, “Okay Team Aqua, first drill starts in half an hour to give Captain Simmons time to talk to his troops, meet me back here then. Dismissed!”

“Yes, sir!” came chorusing back to him as his soldiers went to prepare.

Tucker sighed as he watched them retreat. God knows he hoped they were ready for this. He decided to use his free half hour productively, and go get some answers out of Grif.

* * *

 

Unsurprisingly, Grif was holed up in the mess hall, the rebels on chef duty looking forlornly at the pile of dishes stacking up and the seemingly endless pile of food stacked up in front of Grif.

“Emotional eating again, Grif?” Tucker asked, sliding into the seat next to him.

“Oh fuck, not you.” Grif said as he gathered up as many donuts as he could and made to take off, but Tucker grabbed his arm.

“Oh no you don’t!” Tucker dragged him back down into his seat, “I think I deserve some sort of explanation for what’s happening here!”

“I think what you deserve is to keep your fucking nose out of other peoples business,” Grif grumbled, shoving another donut into his mouth.

“Sooo…” Tucker let the silence stretch, savoring making Grif as uncomfortable as possible, “You and Simmons, ah—“

“Please _, please_ let’s just not have this conversation?” begged Grif, not catching Tucker’s eye.

“And how long have you been…?” Tucker let it hang. Grif sighed in defeat, sensing that Tucker wouldn’t let it go.

“Not long. Now Sarge and Donut are gone it’s been tough, y’know. Neither of us are made for leading. Hell, last time I was promoted we were both nearly executed,” Grif smiled despite himself, as if the memory was a fond one, “So when we got brought to this shit hole, forced to lead a team, friends missing, being treated like we’re something special, blah blah blah; it hit pretty hard. Stuff came out that that we probably should have said a lot earlier and… yeah.” Grif sighed again, still not looking at Tucker. Tucker was taken aback; he hadn’t expected him to be that honest.

“I, uh… Look, I- Um. Congratulations?” Tucker mentally punched himself in the face. Grif looked at him liked he’d just turned into Caboose.

“You’re fucking weird, man. And we’re done talking about this.” Grif gathered up his donuts and left, and this time Tucker didn’t stop him. He saw the guys on chef duty breathe a sigh of relief from the corner of his eye.

Tucker tapped his feet on the floor, unsure of what to do with himself. He glanced around the mess hall, which was empty of anyone he knew. Tucker didn’t like being left on his own these days, his thoughts were volatile, his memories painful and his ability to keep them in check was waning. Too often his thoughts strayed to his dead troops, to Church or to Wash. He tended to dwell on his nightmares, getting caught up in the misery they brought and only being dragged out of it by his remaining friends.

Tucker shook himself and shuffled in his seat. _I should go find Caboose,_ he thought to himself, standing up and making his way from the mess hall.

* * *

 

Tucker tiredly thought that maybe he knew his teammates too well when he also found Caboose in the first place he looked. As predicted, he was standing with his troops in the training room, still attempting to explain the situation to them. His Lieutenant, the big guy with the deep voice, Tucker hadn’t caught his name, was leaning forwards earnestly, trying his hardest to understand what his Captain was attempting to explain to them. Tucker cleared his throat to indicate his presence. 

“Tucker! Oh thank God you are here, Tucker, I have been trying to tell them the plan but they do not understand! _They might be stupid._ ” Caboose ended in a dramatic stage whisper. Tucker turned to the assembled troops.

“How far did he get?” he asked them.

“Well, something about a rescue mission and prisons and, uh, drilling? And then he got distracted talking about someone called Freckles. Sir.” replied the deep voiced soldier Tucker should really learn the name of.

Tucker sighed, and explained it to them fully. It was now only five minutes until the training drills started so Team Blue sprinted away to get ready with hasty salutes and “Thank you, sir!”s.

“Ah, see, that is exactly what I told them!” insisted Caboose.

“Sure,” replied Tucker with a pat on Caboose’s back, “Look I have to go meet up with my team now.”

“Okay Tucker! Oh, this will be fun!” Caboose half-shouted as he left.

Tucker didn’t reply. The heavy feeling was back on his shoulders again, prowling at the back of his mind. All the niggling worries about them not being ready for this. The siren sounded to indicate a training session was about to start, and Tucker headed off to the entrance of the hall to meet up with his team, shaking off the dark thoughts as he went.

_We need them to be ready._


	4. The Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A rescue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to dash, so I haven't read through this! I'll edit properly when I get back, but i'm excited about this one so here you go! =)  
> UPDATE: now edited, hopefully a few less spelling mistakes!

That evening Tucker stumbled back to his room, calling an exhausted goodnight to the rest of the Captains before throwing himself face down onto his bed. After a minute of hazy deliberation he worked up the energy to sit up and remove his helmet and armor. Far too tired to achieve anything else, he flopped back down into bed with only his boxers on. Since that morning they had been training pretty much constantly, rounds of capture the flag, arms and hand-to-hand combat practice and finally a few “prison break” scenarios had wiped out teams and Captains alike. Although, Tucker thought happily, the second prison break had been a pretty good success. Not perfect, but they rescued the “prisoners” and got some praise from Kimball, and that was a damn good start. Tucker’s final thought before drifting off was that maybe tonight he could finally sleep soundly.

* * *

 

It was the day of the rescue. Tucker could feel his heart beat in his mouth and his head swim as he saw the cityscape rise over the horizon from the Pelican his team was riding in, feeling himself lucky the prison was on the outskirts. This was it. The day all the simulations had prepared them for, why they’d been training so hard, what they’d sacrificed so much for. Tucker felt nauseous. He couldn’t let his team see it, though, as they came in to land on top of the building that the recon teams had picked out as their best bet. Immediately they were being fired on from all sides, but the ground troops who had been lying in wait helped them out there. Tucker couldn’t help but feel pride at how much better the rebel troops had gotten since the half-botched rescue mission in the canyon. Maybe Kimball had been right; maybe Tucker and the others had given them hope. Tucker allowed himself a moment for that feeling of pride to blossom in his chest before jumping from the Pelican, drawing his sword as he rolled into landing on the roof, taking out some of the guards that had climbed up there.

There was a staircase leading into the building on the far side of the rooftop, the door to it left ajar from the guards who had coming running up. Tucker heard more clambering up the metal staircase and threw a well-aimed grenade through the doorway, waiting to hear the explosion before gesturing for the others to join him. Teams Blue and Aqua were infiltrating through the roof while Gold and Red tried to bust in the main door. It wasn’t covert, but there was no other way to go about it. Besides, Kimball had shrugged and said it would send them a message for a top-security prison to be taken down in such a spectacular manner.

Tucker made off down the staircase flanked by Evans and Lorne on either side of him. There was a final corner to turn before they reached the ground floor. Tucker gestured at those behind him to keep quiet while he pulled a pin out of a grenade and rolled it down the final section of stairs. There was a cacophony of shouting, the explosion, and then the two teams made their way to the floor, shooting the Feds through the smoke screen created by the bomb. Blue Team stayed behind to keep any more soldiers from making their way down the main corridor whilst Team Aqua moved on ahead to where their intel said the main cells would be. They took out Fed soldiers as they made their way further into the complex, using smoke bombs and grenades as needed.

The adrenaline in Tucker’s system was almost too much to bear, he thought as he cut down another guard and rounded the last corner to where Wash’s cell should be. It was all going so well, just like the simulations. His heart soared and his heart pounded as he thought _Yes! It’s all going to be okay!_

Evans, Lorne and Palomo stood guard at the door as Tucker pushed on alone to the final cells. All of them were empty. Tucker supposed the feds didn’t use this base except for the highest priority prisoners. He blasted open the lock on the last door and entered the room beyond. It was dim, with only four cells inside and two working lightbulbs. _Ha,_ thought Tucker, _Just like the simulation._ He couldn’t hear anyone talking, but he instinctively moved to the cell on the far right. Wash was lying, armorless, in the centre of the bare concrete floor. Tucker blasted open the lock of the cell, panicking that Wash wasn’t moving, that he couldn’t hear anyone else. Something felt wrong.

“Wash? Wash! Hey man, we’re gonna get you out of here, just come with me.” Tucker said as he tried to lift Wash up off the floor.

“T-Tucker?” Wash gazed up at him with confused, dazed eyes.

“Yeah, Wash, it’s me.” Tucker was nearly overwhelmed by the feelings flooding his brain, how much he’d missed Wash, what it had taken to get him back, how much he wanted to get him home. How much he wanted him to be okay.

“Tucker, you’re—“

“Wash, don’t worry, we’re getting you out of here. Where are Donut and Sarge?”

“No, Tucker…” Wash’s eyes widened and fear rushed through Tucker, freezing him to the spot as he felt a presence enter the cell behind him, “You’re dead. We’re all DEAD—“ Wash’s crazed scream was cut short by a bullet entering the centre of his forehead. He fell back out of Tucker’s arms as Tucker turned to see Locus materialize behind him.

Behind the mercenary he could see the bodies of Evans, Lorne and Palomo. He pushed past him as Locus began to laugh, seeing Sarge and Donut’s bodies lying in the other two cells, Caboose, lifeless, at the door, and beyond that Grif lying prone with a hysterically crying Simmons over him. He turned back to face Locus. Behind him he could see more bodies- the rest of the teams along with Cunningham and Rogers. Locus raised his gun so it was tapping against the front of Tucker’s helmet, and pulled the trigger.

Tucker woke up screaming.


	5. Med Bay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tucker is taken to the med bay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, this'll be the last chapter for today! Hope you guys are enjoying it so far, with any luck it won't be too long until I post again =)

“TUCKER, Tucker open this fucking door!” Somewhere through the fog Simmons and Grif were shouting, but Tucker could barely hear them. Why couldn’t he hear them? There was someone… Someone was screaming.

“Captain Tucker this is Kimball, I need you to open your door for me.”

The screaming dulled to moans caught halfway in Tucker’s throat. He tried to shout but his chest hurt and his throat felt constricted, he started to gasp for breath.

“Simmons, take Caboose and go to my office, there are keys in my top left drawer. _Now._ ”

There wasn’t enough air, everything felt too heavy. Tucker felt his body go clammy and cold, he looked down and his hands were shaking like they were made of paper. Panicked, he tried to get to the door but collapsed, his breathing became shallower, more desperate as his head began to swim. Just before he passed out he saw Kimball and a medic run through his door, then everything was blackness.

* * *

 

“Oh, Tucker! Tucker are you awake now?” Tucker groaned and tried to lift his head to get a better view of the blue Caboose-shaped blob at the end of his bed but the small action made his head spin and his stomach churn. He fell back onto his pillow with another groan.

Next thing he knew there was a whole spectrum of variously coloured and variously shaped blobs surrounding him. He took a few deeps breaths and requested some water. After that he felt safe enough to have Grif help sit him up against his pillows.

“What…happened?” It was all hazy. He’d been in the Pelican and then at the prison—no, no that had been a dream. “Why am I in the med bay?”

“You went fucking _crazy,_ dude—“ Grif began, but was cut off by Kimball elbowing him in the ribs.

“Tucker, you had a nightmare and the other Captains heard you screaming. We tried to get to you but we only got into the room after you’d had a panic attack and passed out.” Kimball explained in her no-nonsense way.

“A panic attack?” Tucker hadn’t had one before. He was starting to remember his nightmare now, discerning the details. _No wonder I went nuts,_ he thought, embarrassment coursing through him at the thought of the others finding him passed out.

“Training exercises are cancelled for the day, I want you to get some rest, Captain Tucker, you’re obviously working yourself too hard.” at these words from Kimball Tucker sat bolt upright, ignoring the woozy feeling it brought on.

“You can’t do that!” although she had her helmet on Tucker could feel the raised eyebrow, “I mean it’s not worth it, if you insist I stay here then just get someone else to lead them for the day.”

“Tucker, you’ll be their leader in the field. That’s what they’re training for.”

“I know, but please. Just for today.” he felt embarrassed practically begging Kimball in front of everyone, but he needed for them to train, “They need to be ready.” he stressed, vividly recalling their dead bodies littering the corridor in his dreams, Locus’s demented laugh still ringing in his ears.

The desperate, slightly panicked look in Tucker’s eyes must have been enough to convince Kimball because she started muttering into her headset about finding someone of high enough rank to take over for the day. Tucker lay back, relieved. Kimball studied him for a moment, obviously trying to determine what had brought all this on.

“The rest of you, training will start in two hours. I’ll inform your teams but you guys should get to the training room to help set up because I already gave those guys the day off. Oh, and you’ll need to direct Tucker’s replacement to where he needs to be, okay?” The rest of the group started to stand up. Simmons patted him on the shoulder while Caboose shouted that he’d be back as soon as training ended, but Grif hadn’t moved from the seat to the right of Tucker’s bed. Simmons reached the door and gestured for Grif to join him, but he shook his head.

“Nah man, I’ll stay for a minute.” another nod and Simmons was convinced, if confused, and left the med bay with a little wave.

“Dude, you don’t have to stay here with me, it’s okay.” said Tucker. Honestly, he was quite embarrassed by the whole ordeal.

“What, and do extra work? Noo thank you.” But the way he was looking down at his hands said to Tucker there was more to it than that.

“Well, thanks. Sitting in here all day on my own isn’t going to be fun.” Tucker sighed.

“Nah, whenever I have a panic attack they let me back to my room after a couple of hours.” Tucker tried not to look surprised.

“So you, uh, get these?” God, he really didn’t know how to talk about this stuff. Grif nodded, still not looking up.

“Yeah, um. Since my mom ran out on us when we were little. I mean the whole war thing didn’t help either but, yeah.”

“Oh,” came Tucker’s witty response. The urge to punch himself in the face resurfaced; it seemed to do that a lot when Grif was unexpectedly honest, “I, uh, hadn’t had one before.”

“Yeah, I guessed that from all the screaming.” They both laughed quietly, “But I know how scary it can be, and I know how much it helped when Simmons found out and could be there for me when I had one so, uh, if you ever- if you ever needed anyone, I uh—“ Grif rubbed the back of his head nervously, obviously unsure of how to phrase his offer.

Tucker was looking a the Red like… Well, like he didn’t know what. This was totally uncommon territory for him and Grif. Although he couldn’t say it was unwelcome.

“Uh, that—“ with no small amount of horror Tucker realized his voice was croaky from working around a lump in his throat. He hurriedly cleared his throat, placing blame on his lack of rest and fragile state, “That sounds good, man. Uh, thank you for… this.”

“It’s no problem. Just thought you’d appreciate knowing you didn’t have to do all this on your own. And Kimball’s right, by the way. You are pushing yourself too hard.” Grif mumbled.

“Yeah, maybe.” Tucker admitted. The last few days had been tough. Waiting for intel and the intensive training had been playing havoc with his sleeping and, come to think of it, his waking hours too.

“I, uh, have to go see to my troops. And I suppose see to Simmons, too.” Grif said, rising from his seat by Tucker’s bed.

“Bow chicka wow wow?” Tucker said, waggling his eyebrows and grinning. Grif batted his shoulder.

“ _No,_ like I have to go talk to his troops for him because it takes too fucking long for him to do it himself. You know. The stuttering and squeaking and everything.”

“Suuuure…” Tucker drawled, still smiling widely.

“Shut the fuck up, Tucker.” Grif said, but smiling. He smacked his shoulder again and left the med bay, Tucker was still laughing gently.

 _I suppose war really does change people,_ he thought, gazing around the med bay trying to catch the eye of someone who would let him leave, _but I could definitely get used to this new Grif._


	6. Intel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tucker gets back to training.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I'd just quickly like to say a huge thank to everyone that's been reading, and an extra big thank you to those that have commented =) I'm not as happy with this chapter, but i'd love to know what you think! I hope you enjoy it

Grif had been right, Tucker had caught a medic’s eye, flashed them his winning smile and been able to return to his quarters for the rest of the day. He’d only stayed there for another hour or so, reluctantly studying the pamphlet filled with grotesque side effects that had come with his pills. Tucker wasn’t one for sitting still. It wasn’t long before he abandoned his room and made his way to the training hall, picking a high balcony and watching the prison break sequence the teams were attempting today.

The scenarios had been ramping up in difficulty as the days went on. As soon as they perfected one a more difficult situation would be constructed, the Captains would be left to devise a strategy and the teams would practice under their leadership. Occasionally, Kimball would leave her office and take a high level team to set up “surprises” in the course. Tucker leant forward on the railing of the balcony, fondly watching his teammates go about the exercise. He couldn’t help but to allow an intense feeling of pride to overtake him. Simply watching the teams attempt the new scenario was heartwarming- they had improved so much since the first disastrous attempts that Tucker couldn’t help but to let himself think _they can do this._ Of course, having capable Captains was a big part of their improvement, and after what had happened to Tucker’s team all of the Captains had stepped up their game. They took the whole thing much more seriously; now they knew there were more than just their lives at stake.

Tucker was back in the training hall the next day. It continued to be difficult but Tucker made sure he only pushed himself as far as he could go, no further. This meant sleeping for a reasonable amount of time each night, helped along by the sleeping pills prescribed to him by the medics, and eating at least twice every day. Quite apart from his new resolve not to drive himself to madness, he knew that if he went too far there would be Caboose telling him he should take a break, Grif dragging him to the mess hall or Simmons pointing out that everyone else had left, maybe he should get himself to bed.

At the back of Tucker’s head he knew he should be feeling patronized by all of this attention, but honestly he could tell it was helping. The dark thoughts about Church or Wash still stuck with him, but instead of driving him to distraction he utilized them: The thought of rescuing Wash pushed him to train better, while remembering Church made him want to be a better leader. It was a system that was working well, for now.

A few days later, it was another new prison break set up. There were more doors to open, locks to break, rooms to check. It had taken the Captains longer than usual to formulate a plan, with Kimball looking over them like a stern headmistress. _Whatever,_ thought Tucker, he knew she was just as proud of the Captains’ progress as he was of his teams. It then took a further ten minutes to make it absolutely clear to Caboose what was happening. Tucker desperately wanted to prove to everyone, especially Kimball, that he was fine to lead his team. He hadn’t told anyone, not even Grif, that sometimes he still looked at them and the image of their corpses flashed before his eyes. It make his heart race and his breath quicken, but he was getting better at pushing it out of his mind.

When he’d returned to duty his troops had made a point of saying how glad they were to have him back, a made various pointed statements about his replacement. Tucker couldn’t help but think someone had put them up to it, but he accepted the compliments with his usual grace (“ _Fuck yeah, because I’m fucking awesome!_ ”). Now he was firmly back as their leader. The siren blared to signal that planning time was over, time for the mission to begin. Tucker unsheathed his sword and smirked, he had a feeling this would go well.

* * *

 

            Two days and two perfected prison breaks later, Tucker and Grif were taking a lunch break (Grif’s second of the day) in the mess hall.

            “I _need_ you to stop talking right now,” groaned Grif, shoving more sandwich into his mouth and avoiding eye contact while trying not to laugh.

            “Why, man, it’s an honest question!” asked Tucker, being as loud as possible without shouting.

            “ _Stop_.” Grif smacked his head on the table, and Tucker’s grin widened so much it looked like it would split his face in half.

            “I mean it’s not a hard question, dude, I just wanna know who tops!” Tucker asked, quieter than before. He wasn’t a total asshole.

            “I’m never speaking to you again. Fuckin’ Blues.” Grif grumbled resentfully.

            Tucker began to laugh but the sound died in his throat when he caught sight of a stripe of orange moving outside the mess hall. He turned his head fast enough to get whiplash, causing Grif to look up at him worriedly. Felix was briskly walking by the hall, in the direction of Kimball’s office.

            Tucker leapt to his feet, ignoring Grif’s questions as he jogged outside. Felix had disappeared into the milling troops on their break. Tucker moved through them as quickly as possible, but still couldn’t catch sight of the merc. It didn’t matter though; Tucker knew where he was headed.

            Pushing on through the training hall towards Kimball’s office Tucker’s heart started to pound. For the past week Felix had been heading the recon team in the city, and the only reason he would be back now was if they’d gathered the intel they were looking for. Tucker broke out into a run as the door to the office appeared from around the corner of the corridor. He wasn’t thinking straight and he knew it but he couldn’t bring himself to care; _they knew where Wash was._

Tucker reached the door still at a run, pushing it open and nearly colliding with the desk. He was breathing heavily and knew he must look half-crazed, but Kimball didn’t seem surprised by him bursting in. Hell, by this point she probably thought Tucker had a sixth sense for knowing when him being there would annoy her most. She had a look of deep concern on her face.

            “What?” asked Tucker, feeling chills run down his spine, “What’s happened, did you- have you got the intel?” Kimball paused, but the sighed.

            “Yes, Captain Tucker, we have the intel. We know where they’re being held, we know they’re all together and as far as we can tell they’re all still alive.” Tucker’s heart soared, but Kimball’s expression said there was something else to it.

            “So why the face?” Tucker asked, dreading the answer.

            Kimball turned to Felix, offering him the chance to answer.

            “While we were doing recon on the compound it became clear that there was someone else watching too. And if we saw her, she’s definitely seen us.” Tucker’s mind was racing. Although he knew, he had to ask. He swallowed heavily.

            “Who was watching?”

            “Agent Carolina.”


	7. Carolina

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tucker and Felix go to find Carolina

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thanks again to everyone that's been reading and commenting =) Sorry there was no chapter last night, but this was kind of a long one. Hope you enjoy!

Tucker and Felix dropped to crouch behind an outer wall of the compound. Although it hadn’t been left long enough to have fallen apart, the building had obviously been abandoned for a number of years. According to the information they’d gathered, the Federation had abandoned it after a rebel attack, moving the equipment to a safer facility in the city. Tucker turned to Felix who nodded and gestured for him to stay. He knew where he was headed- there was supposedly a bust door on in the western wall. They were relying on the assumption that Carolina hadn’t patched up every door in the compound, instead hoping just being in an abandoned building in the middle of the forest would deter people from entering. Tucker wasn’t so sure, but that’s why he’d agreed to Felix joining him on the mission.

            Tucker hadn’t known what to think since the meeting with Kimball. After the rest of the Captain’s had joined them she’d filled them in on the details. There had been at least three sightings of Carolina around the base, and a small team had followed her to where she had apparently holed up. As far as anyone could tell, she was doing the same as them- scoping out the building, checking for weak spots.

Kimball hadn’t been convinced that Carolina could be trusted, and Tucker was inclined to agree. He didn’t really know why he had advocated so passionately to be the one to find her, insisting that if he could convince her to join them then she would be the most valuable ally they could hope for. Kimball’s eyebrows had told a whole epic story throughout his speech. Honestly, he had surprised himself with how convincing he had been. The Red Captains had grudgingly agreed, but Caboose had been uncharacteristically quiet. Tucker couldn’t think of a thing to say to him, he had been trying to remove the thought of Church as far from his mind as possible, but it wasn’t working.

As he crouched there now behind the wall, Tucker still wasn’t sure why he’d reacted how he did. Obviously it was true that having Carolina on side would basically guarantee their mission to be successful, but it was more instinctive than that. Although he tried to deny it Tucker couldn’t lie to himself; the thought of being able to confront Church had taken over. It was why he was so reluctant for Felix to join him- although he had said it was to keep the mission as covert as possible, he knew it was really because it was going to get very, very personal.

He took a deep breath and adjusted his position as Felix scouted ahead to check the door. He had no idea what he was going to say to either of them. There was no doubt that when he saw Church he would explode, _too fucking bad I can’t break an AI’s nose,_ he thought bitterly. He tried to focus his mind on Carolina instead. Getting Carolina to help with the rescue mission, getting Wash back. The anger Tucker felt was instantly doused with another emotion that he chose not to examine too closely. _Wash, focus on Wash._

Suddenly, Felix was back beside him, shaking Tucker from his reverie and beckoning for him to follow. Felix gently pushed the small side-door and it opened without setting off any alarms, although it did creak alarmingly. Felix went in first, scanning every level of the courtyard the door opened into before telling Tucker to join him. They both looked around. The courtyard was surrounded on three sides by to levels of balconies, and on the fourth by the wall. It was starting to become overgrown with small, new plants, but it’s emptiness made Tucker shiver. The whole set-up looked like something out of a horror movie.

“Okay,” Tucker sighed, “Thank you for your help, Felix, I’ll take it from here,” he addressed the merc, trying to imitate his usual swagger despite the great feeling of unease in his chest. He cleared his throat.

“OH AGENT CAROLIIIIIIIIIINAAAAAAAAA,” he hollered, “IT’S TUCKER, YOUR FAVOURITE GUY! COME OUT SO WE CAN CATCH UP.”

“Oh for _fuck’s sake._ “ Felix began, “What was all that shit about keeping the mission covert?”

“We’ll never fucking find her if we go covert. Always remember: she is way better than us. At everything.” Tucker said. Although he couldn’t see it he could assume Felix had rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, or you’ve just given her our position and now she’s taken off.”

“We’re here to talk to her, Felix, not kill her. I know the concept might be difficult for you.” Felix grumbled something insulting under his breath, but was proven wrong when the light blue-armored Carolina appeared on the balcony straight ahead of them.

“Hey, baby! Fancy letting us in?” Tucker called up to her. The nerves were causing his bravado to skyrocket.

“Not really, Tucker,” Carolina said as she crossed her arms, “What do you and the merc want with little ol’ me?”

“Agent Carolina, I’m Felix. My team and I saw you scoping out the Federation base on the outskirts of the city. We’re just wanting to talk.” Felix replied, obviously not trusting Tucker to get them in.

“What about?” Carolina asked sharply, leaning forward onto the balcony. Tucker couldn’t tell if Carolina was toying with them or being genuinely hostile. Either way it made him furious, after she had run out on them, her and Church both had _no right_ to _—Wash. Focus on Wash._ Tucker took a shuddering breath.

“You know who they’re holding there?” he asked. He got a simple nod in reply from Carolina, “Well, me and the rest of the Reds and Blues that are left have been training with the New Republic to get them back. Me, Caboose, Grif and Simmons are Captains and—“ Tucker paused a moment to figure out why Carolina’s subtle shuffle and head tilt bothered him. Then he realized, “You… already know all this, don’t you?”

“Give me a minute, I’ll come down.” Carolina said, straightening up and moving into the shadows to the back of the balcony.

“You weren’t supposed to give her that much information, Tucker,” chastised Felix, although he sounded more exasperated than angry.

“News flash, Felix, she’ll never agree to come with unless we give her the information.” Tucker was more abrupt than he intended. He was just now coming to terms with how big of an asset Carolina would be. He had practically forgotten that the main aim of the mission was to persuade her to join them, not just to give Church a huge, furious piece of his mind. Right in his face.

Carolina appeared from a shadowy doorway, helmet tucked underneath her arm, fiery hair pulled back, and an entirely unimpressed expression on her face.

“Yes, Tucker, I know you’ve been working with the New Republic. I know you’re all Captains. I know where the headquarters is, I know your Lieutenant’s name is Palomo, I know their leader is called Vanessa Kimball. But what I _asked_ was ‘what do you want to talk to me about?’” she rattled off, punctuating each of the last few words precisely and looking bored the entire time.

“But—how do you—“ began Felix. 

“You stole some weapons from a Federation base. I went to investigate. You’re actually pretty good Felix, but not good enough to leave a trail I couldn’t follow. I found out about you and the rebels and watched them. Eventually, it became obvious that something big was happening. I thought they were planning a full-scale attack on the city based on how excited the soldiers were. Of course, turns out it was just you,” Tucker felt heat rise in his face, “Anyway, after I realized who the Feds had taken prisoner I knew I had to act before Locus tore them apart,” _Oh, so you do give a shit,_ thought Tucker bitterly, “So I hacked their system. Whoever hired Locus only interacted with him through a voice-changer and in written messages, so it was easy enough imitate. Of course, I had to kill her to stop her belaying my orders. Apparently she was some kind of recluse; there’s been no panic yet about her death. I’ve been keeping an eye on the compound ever since waiting for a chance to bust ‘em out. So, _what do you want to talk to me about?_ ” She kept a straight face throughout, keeping eye contact with either Felix or Tucker. Right now, her gaze was fixed on Tucker.

“I think you already know,” he said, having come to the realization during her speech that the mission had probably been for nothing. He should have guessed from the moment Felix had told him Carolina had been sighted, “Because, Carolina, I know that there’s no way in hell that the New Republic recon team could have seen you unless you wanted to be seen.” Carolina smirked.

“Maybe you’re not quite as dumb as you look, Tucker.”

“So what, you’ve just been waiting for us to beg for your help?” Carolina raised an eyebrow and grimaced.

“Yeah Tucker, how do you think your Kimball would react if I just come waltzing in to her HQ? What if I had to kill some of her troops to get through? No, I had to wait for you to come to me,” Carolina shuffled, obviously bored with explaining things to Tucker, “Do you want my help or do you want to keep asking stupid questions?”

Tucker didn’t reply, he’d seen someone else move out of the doorway behind Carolina. Church moved from out of the shadows, new body in his old colours, and waved his hand awkwardly in Tucker’s direction.

“Uh, hey Tucker,” he said, and then, “SON OF A BITCH—“ as Tucker’s fist collided with his helmet.


	8. Church

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tucker confronts Church.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I hope you like this one, please leave feedback if you can =) Not sure when the next chapter will be up, hopefully not long!

The first punch sent Church reeling backwards, stumbling. Before he could recover Tucker dove in again with two more rapid punches to his face.

“Wait, wait, wait!” called Church, raising his hands weakly between Tucker and himself. In response, Tucker landed a sidekick to his solar plexus, causing Church to fall backwards with a heavy groan. Tucker didn’t hesitate; throwing himself down on Church with a yell and repeatedly punching him round the head.

“YOU- STUPID- SELFISH- COCKSUCKING- MOTHERFUCKING-“ Tucker punctuated his punches, unable to fathom his anger into sentences. Somewhere behind him, Felix was yelling. Suddenly, Tucker felt someone pull him up off of Church by his shoulders. He continued to swing in Church’s direction, swearing the whole time. Carolina eventually managed to drag him away, keeping hold of his shoulders.

“FUCKER- ASSHOLE- _TRAITOR_!” Tucker finished, exhausted, as he finally turned to face Carolina.

“You done?” She asked, not seeming at all surprised by his outburst. Tucker seethed silently. To the side of them Church stumbled to his feet, coughing.

“Tucker, look,” he began weakly, “You know that I didn’t mean to abandon you guys, right? A-And I didn’t expect for you to get dragged into all this crap! I thought we’d go investigate the planet and then come back to the canyon! I didn’t realize.” Tucker thought bitterly that this was probably the most pathetic he’d ever heard Church sound.

“After everything? After we risked all that for you and her,” he gestured at Carolina, “to get your revenge? And we still did that after all the _shit_ you said to us? And then you think it’s fine to go running off again without even saying goodbye?!” the volume of his voice rose, he felt a flash of anger when he realized Carolina’s hands and tightened around his shoulders again.

“I- I didn’t realize—“

“I DON’T CARE!” Tucker roared, ripping himself away from Carolina to stand right in front of Church, “I DON’T GIVE A SHIT HOW LONG YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING FOR, CHURCH, BECAUSE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE GONE AT ALL!”

Church didn’t say a thing, elevating Tucker’s rage to new levels.

“What, no more excuses?! Do you have NOTHING TO SAY TO ME?” he forcefully pushed Church backwards, “You did abandon us; you left us all in that canyon when we needed you. You left us to be attack and dragged into someone else’s war. Now Sarge and Donut and Wash are gone, and you weren’t there to help. We had to become leaders, Church. Even Caboose,” Tucker noted with grim pleasure that Church cringed at the mention of Caboose’s name, “And the truly sad thing is that now we’re here to beg for your fucking help,” He shook his head and snorted, “Even though we’ve put so much work into being better leaders. I don’t think Kimball realizes we were so shitty at first because we learnt it all from you.” With that, he turned from Church and began to walk away, back towards where Felix was standing.

“So… You still want out help?” Carolina asked in a manner that suggested she really didn’t want to get involved.

“Yes, Carolina. We want your help, because we want our friends back.” Tucker answered, ignoring the lump in his throat, “After that you can do whatever the fuck you want.” 

* * *

Felix had radioed base to tell them the mission had been a success and to send a jeep to pick them up from the location. The ride back had been awkward for everyone involved. The troops sent to pick them up treated Church and Carolina with the same kind of hero-worship they had towards the Reds and Blues when they had first been brought in. For Tucker, bitterness and anger kept him silent as well as feeling a steadily increasing amount of guilt. After all, no matter how angry he was with Church he’d still missed his friend and, however much he tried to ignore it, he did regret not giving Church a real chance to explain himself.

Once they were back to base Carolina and Church were taken to meet Kimball, while Tucker and Felix gave a report to one of her deputies. After that, Tucker stormed off to his quarters, throwing his helmet at the wall the second he got through to door. He managed a couple of minutes of lying in sullen silence on his bed before sighing in defeat and sitting back up. He rubbed the back of his hand across his eyes and cursed himself for being so weak willed. Then he cursed Church for being such a dick for good measure. Could never have too many curses.

Ten minutes later he was in the training hall, wondering if Carolina and Church were still with Kimball or where their quarters would be. Giving up his last ounce of pride he decided to ask Kimball, but before he had got very far he was cut off by Caboose. Tucker felt something that verged disgustingly close to affection to see Caboose nearly vibrating with excitement, talking non-stop to his Lieutenant who was being dragged along behind him by his hand.

Tucker knew he could have run away, and a year ago he certainly would have. This time, though, Tucker simply steeled himself for the barrage of enthusiasm he knew would be directed his way right about n—

“TUCKERRRRRR!” Tucker thought he might be getting too nice for his own good, “TUCKER Church is back! I was just telling my very nice friend here all about how Church is my very very best friend and that now he is back and we are going to see him are you going to see him too, Tucker?” The Lieutenant awkwardly waved at Tucker, his height meant he was bent over to keep a hold on Caboose’s hand.

“Uh, yeah, I was just trying to find him.” somehow he couldn’t find the energy to be annoyed, so he settled for wryly amused.

“I KNOW WHERE HE IS FOLLOW ME!” Caboose physically jumped with excitement.

“Okay—woah-!” Caboose had grabbed Tucker’s hand in his free one and steamrolled forwards, leaving Tucker and the Lieutenant to awkwardly bump into each other behind him. Eventually they reached the mess hall, where Caboose released them and threw open the doors in an overly dramatic fashion.

“CHUUUUUUUUUURCH!” Church’s head whipped around from where he was sitting then yelled as Caboose bodily threw himself on top of him, knocking him off his seat, “CHURCH I HAVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!”

“Oh Jesus Christ,” said Church, winded, “Uh, yeah Caboose, you too.” Caboose’s Lieutenant scurried over to help Caboose up whilst Tucker sauntered over quietly. Caboose immediately began to talk rapidly, switching confusingly between talking about Church to his Lieutenant and to Church about what they had been doing.

“— and _so_ much has been happening since you… left.” Suddenly the atmosphere in the room chilled. Church was sat up on the floor and his eyes darted to Tucker, who was suddenly frozen to the spot. The Lieutenant was glancing nervously between Tucker and Church, looking ready to drag his Captain away at the first sign of a fight. There were a few moments of tension before Tucker sighed and held a hand out to Church. Church took it gratefully, pulling himself up to face them.

“Yeah, look I really need to say—what I should have said earlier is—“ Tucker rolled his eyes, “I uh, I shouldn’t have left you like that. Either of you. It was wrong of me to go and especially to not say goodbye. It was no way to treat my… best friends. And i’m sorry.”

The uncomfortable silence stretched out between them. Then, Tucker began to sarcastically slow clap.

“Fucking hell, Church has learnt to show emotion that isn’t hatred! What the fuck has Carolina done to you?” Church looked so scandalized that Tucker couldn’t help but laugh, “I’m kidding, fuckwit. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry for beating the shit out of you earlier.”

“You call that beating the shit out of me? I barely felt a thing, man, you must have gone soft holed up in here. Well, soft _er._ ” he was grinning widely.

“Whatever, dude! You didn’t land one hit on me, not a single fucking hit—“

“Oh shut the fuck up, bitch—“

“You’re calling me a bitch after your little BFF speech there, huh?”

“Oh I’m sorry, should I have expressed myself by beating the shit out you instead, you fuckin’ Neanderthal?”

“Whatever, bitch!”

“You’re the bitch, bitch.”

“Is this… are they made up?” asked Caboose’s Lieutenant, still on edge in case a fight broke out.

“Oh, yes, this is pretty much back to normal now.” said Caboose happily, watching his friends bicker with a satisfied smile on his face.


	9. Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Carolina and Church on-side, the rescue mission goes ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooh, this is the one, guys!! Very excited about it, I hope it came out alright! It's about twice as long as any of the other chapters. I hope you all enjoy it, please leave feedback =) And I hope everyone enjoys the new episode tonight, too =D

Tucker’s mind whirred as quickly and noisily as the Pelican’s blades above his head. Grif had thought he was going insane when Tucker had requested that he slap him before they set off, but for Tucker, it was worth it just to know this was real. It was happening, not a dream. Not this time.

After pooling the information Carolina and Church had gathered with their own, Kimball had given them three days to work their team’s routines in with Carolina, Church and now that he had returned from recon, Felix. Tucker had looked on with pride as he saw his troops perfectly execute the scenario; he sensed Carolina and Church’s surprise at how efficiently they acted. Now, it was the day of the rescue mission.

He felt a chill run through him as the cityscape rose above the horizon, reminding him all too clearly of his earlier nightmare. Then, the Pelican began to descend, the emerging skyline being their signal to drop the troops to continue on by jeep. Carolina, Felix and Tucker made up the advance team, while the others hung back slightly, waiting for them to clear the outer guards.

The three lay down on a low overhang that overlooked the front of the compound, Carolina armed with a sniper rifle, Felix and Tucker prepared to drop down and take out the guards on the ground. They were silent as this point, Tucker assumed the other two no longer got nervous at times like this, but his nerves were jangling. His heart pounded as he inspected the building and guards, knowing that Wash was located somewhere inside.

“Sync.” Carolina whispered to Tucker’s left, lining up her first shot.

“Sync.” came Felix’s reply from the other side, crouching low and getting ready to take off down the hill, cocking his gun

“…Sync.” Tucker drew his sword. Carolina’s first shot taking out one of the guards at the door.

The compound was immediately in an uproar, guards moving to try and locate the shooter who was picking off more and more of them.

“Okay, get down there,” said Carolina. Tucker and Felix took off down the hill, moving to take out the guards who were coming from the sides to investigate what was happening at the main entrance. Over the radio, Carolina called in for the rest of the troops to join them as Tucker cut down the new guards appearing through the entrance. While Tucker had been distracted with them, another had come running through and set off an alarm based just inside the door.

“Shit!” Carolina’s voice came over the radio, “Hold the door, I’ll come down and disable it.”

At that moment, the rest of the teams joined them, taking their pre-decided positions and joining in the fight. Carolina yelled over the radio for cover fire as she sprinted towards the entrance and immediately got to work on the alarm system. There was no longer a barely-controllable rush of guards coming from the doors, instead the side doors had been barricaded, and the remaining guards had retreated inside. Tucker knew this meant they had limited time before someone sent for reinforcements.

“There!” Carolina shouted, the alarm cut off dead, “That will of informed their command that they’re under attack, we need to move now!” she gestured for the teams to move into the building. Tucker and Felix hung back, Grif slapping Tucker on the shoulder as he moved by with his team.

“Gold team in position, corridor clear.” Came the radio message a minute later from Grif, signaling that they were based outside the entrance to the first section of the compound.

“Confirmed,” Carolina radioed back, “We’re following in behind team Red, team Red confirm position?”

“Confirmed, we’re at section two, ready for your order.” Tucker noted that Simmons’s voice was shaking, but still sounded much more confident than in some of the training exercises they’d been through.

“Confirmed, Red team, team Aqua is moving in.”

At that, Carolina, Tucker, Felix and the Aqua team moved into the building, Tucker patting Caboose’s shoulder, who’s team was staying behind to hold the exit along with Church, as he passed.

They ran on their way to the farthest section of the compound, passing by the first two sections and hearing the gunfire emanating from them.

“Gold team, status?” Carolina radioed through.

            “Section one clear, working on freeing the captives.”

            “Private Donut?”

            “We have him, but he’s injured.” Tucker felt his heart sink.

            “Can you get him to the exit point?”

            “Yeah, we’re on it.”

            Just then, a group of guards rounded the corner. Felix threw up his shield, the others getting low and firing. The attackers were caught by surprise, and in the second of confusion before they began returning fire three had fallen. Just then, Tucker noticed Palomo ducking out from behind the corner to fire, focusing his attention on one of the guards but neglecting to realize another one was aiming for him. Without thinking, Tucker threw himself across the corridor to push Palomo out of the line of fire and felt white-hot pain rip threw his shoulder.

            “Captain!” he heard Palomo shout, Tucker screamed and clutched at his shoulder, just barely registering Carolina taking out the last two guards with vicious precision. Another of his team members removed his helmet.

            “Agent Carolina, what is your status? Teams Red and Gold are at the exit point with the released prisoners, I’m sending in evac teams now.” Kimball radioed in.

            “We have injured, send someone from Blue team back to collect Captain Tucker and take him to evac point—“

            “No!” Tucker gritted his teeth, “No, I’m carrying on.”

            “Tucker, no offence, but we’ve wasted enough time here, this needs to be done fast.”

            “Carolina,” Tucker stood up, hiding how woozy he felt, “I can do this.” Carolina paused, then was back on the radio.

            “Belay that order, Kimball, Tucker is staying with us, we’re moving on into section three, will release prisoners as we go and send them to exit point one to meet Blue team.”

            “Negative, Agent Carolina, exit point one is compromised, send them up to the roof, we’re sending in Pelicans.” Tucker may have been distracted by the pain, but Kimball sounded worried.

            “What happened at exit point one?”

            “Locus is there. Move fast.” Kimball, despite her blunt speech, was clearly scared. Tucker immediately turned to his team.

            “Get up to the roof now, we’ll push on and get the others.” he tried desperately to stop his voice from shaking. His team exchanged glances.

            “Captain, there’s no chance.” answered Palomo as Evans and Lorne nodded their consent. Tucker wanted to retaliate but Carolina interrupted.

            “We’re moving on _now_ , Tucker, if you’re coming with us get moving.” so he dropped the subject, picking up his handgun with his left hand.

            “Kimball, could we have an update on the other teams?” Tucker wheezed, thinking of Church and Caboose coming up against Locus.

            “All accounted for; either left of leaving. Focus on your mission, Tucker.” Tucker obeyed, trying to conserve his breath and level his mind. As was becoming a habit, he used Wash to focus himself, using him as a reminder of why he was putting himself through all of this.

            They pushed on, eventually reaching the section three cells, Carolina, Felix and team Aqua began to set the prisoners free, directing them to the nearest roof-access point. Tucker was restless, and very aware of the amount of blood he was losing.

            “Carolina, I’m going to push ahead and find Wash, you guys carry on here.”

            “You sure?”

            “Yeah, I’m sure.”

            “Okay then.” Carolina was preoccupied, opening cells and keeping a look out down the corridor.

            Tucker started to move ahead, moving as fast as he could without losing balance. After a while, he was passing by empty cells, but he pushed on although he was starting to stumble. There was a hazy dizziness pushing in on him, forcing him to slow down. He couldn’t come this far and not find him, not now.

            “Wash?” he called out, panicking at how even that exertion caused his head to spin. There was a moment of silence.

            “…Tucker?” the incredulous voice came from a nearby cell, Tucker felt his heart leap and immediately stumbled towards it, but he was too weak. He fell into the bars and dropped his gun. Breathing heavily, he managed to force himself up onto his knees and saw Wash move towards him, awkwardly dragging one leg behind him. Judging by the sickening angle, it had been badly broken. Wash’s face was covered in small cuts and bruises and his lip was split, but his expression was a mix of joy, confusion and concern.

            “Fuck, you’re hurt. Where’s your team?” Wash asked. Tucker couldn’t answer, he took a moment to catch his breath before dragging himself up by the bars to stand.

            “What are you doing?!” Wash exclaimed.

            “Just… stay back.” Tucker grimaced at the effort speaking took. He drew his sword in his left hand, but was shaking so badly he knew he couldn’t get enough power behind it in his non-dominant hand. He gingerly passed the sword to his right hand, pushed the heel of his free hand onto his bleeding shoulder for some stability and took a deep breath before swinging his arm up and pulverizing the lock of the cell.

            Wash yelled his name as Tucker screamed and fell to the ground, the world span madly and his shoulder felt as if red-hot pokers were being shoved through the open wound. He stayed on his knees, eyes streaming and blackness forming at the edges of his vision.

            “Tucker, return to our position, we’re going.” Carolina came on through the radio.

            Wash had dragged himself through the busted door, taking Tucker’s face in his hands and forcing him up to look at him.

            “Tucker, come on, you have to focus now. We have to go.” Wash rested his forehead against Tucker’s, trying to heal him through sheer force of will. Tucker laughed quietly.

            “Well, aren’t we a pair?” the world tilted alarmingly.

            “Tucker, please respond.” came in from the radio.

            “Tucker, come on, don’t do this now. Don’t do this, we have to go.” Tucker heard Wash’s voice crack and felt his hand tighten around Tucker’s.

            “Tucker, NOW—GODDAMMIT.” Carolina’s voice was cut off and the sound of gunfire came through the radio as someone screamed. Fear suddenly erupted in Tucker, clearing his mind a certain amount. That or adrenaline.

            “Locus is here, isn’t he?” asked Wash, who was white as a sheet. Tucker nodded, and again used what felt like his last reserves of energy to pull himself up, and then drag Wash up beside him, allowing him to lean on his left side and wrapping his arm around his waist.

            “I haven’t done all this just for us both to die here.” Tucker slurred through gritted teeth, ignoring Wash’s worried glance and instead beginning to move down the corridor, slowly at first but picking up some speed once they had got used to walking together. Tucker was gasping for air, but propelled himself forwards nonetheless, fighting his blackening vision and spinning view with the thought of getting Wash safe, helping the others, _not dying here_.

            What felt like hours of pain-filled stumbling came to a halt as the pair rounded the corner to where Tucker remembered the empty cells had begun to appear, although every cell was empty now. Ahead of them, Locus had placed himself in the middle of the corridor, blocking their way. A bolt of terror ran through Tucker at the sight.

“Your friends were very sorry, but they had to leave without you. Of course, not all of them were lucky enough to make it that far.” His foot nudged Palomo’s dead body that was splayed out next to him on the floor, back of his helmet stained red with blood. Tucker felt ice flood his body.

“Locus…” Tucker hissed, rage, pain and desperation mingling within him. He tightened his arm around Wash’s waist. Locus looked up from Palomo.

“I suppose you are hoping I’ll prolong your lives, try and gain information? Give your friends chance to rescue you?” He sighed, “I regret to inform you, Captain Tucker, that I have been given no such orders,” he cocked his gun, “I wouldn’t worry too much. I am only shooting Agent Washington first for my own amusement,” he aimed the gun at Wash’s head, Tucker felt him stiffen against his side, “You will not last much longer.”

Tucker’s mind was sluggish and panicked, desperately searching for any way they could possibly get by him, but he couldn’t make his brain work properly. All he could think about was losing Wash so soon after he’d found him, before they’d even have a chance to talk. The thought was so overpowering that everything else was drowned out, even when faced with the barrel of Locus’s gun.

“Hey asshole, why not pick on someone your own size?” Carolina had materialized behind Locus, shotgun pointed at the back of his head. Tucker could quite honestly say he had never been happier to hear her voice. Locus growled. Carolina and Tucker both realized what he was about to do a split-second before he pulled the trigger.

“Get down!” yelled Carolina in the same moment that Tucker threw himself down on the floor, dragging Wash down with him. He hadn’t had the time to position his wounded arm, and he screamed as his shoulder slammed into the floor, white spots of pain dancing in front of his eyes. Wash had also yelled out from under him as his leg was crushed between Tucker and the concrete.

Locus fired off the shot into the space where Wash’s head had been just before; Tucker heard it slam into the wall behind them. He saw Locus whip around with a yell, aiming a swing at Carolina who blocked it with her outer forearm, ducked deftly under his second punch and kicked his legs out from under him while he was still lunged forward. Locus quickly raised himself up onto his knees, but Carolina was faster. She aimed a sidekick at his throat, sending Locus reeling backwards with a sickening choking sound. Carolina stood to the side of him before he could recover, gently placing her foot over his throat and lazily lifting her handgun from her side and pointing it at his head.

“Tucker,” she called, and without taking her eyes off of Locus she tossed him her handgun. Tucker managed to catch it left-handed, stumbling up from the ground and helping Wash up into a sitting position before heading over to where Carolina and Locus were, “I thought maybe you’d like some revenge for your man there.” she said as he reached them, nodding her head towards Palomo. Tucker nodded in thanks.

“You know, Locus,” he began, stepping up to the side of his head, “I suppose you’re hoping I’ll _prolong your life_ ,” he mockingly recalled the merc’s earlier words, “Something to do with me being a good man and sparing you, blah blah blah,” he casually waved the hand holding the gun around to emphasize his point, trying his hardest not to pass out from the effort of standing, “But I regret to inform you, that I’m not that good of a guy. That guy you killed, my Lieutenant? _He_ was a good guy. So don’t worry- you won’t last much longer.” Tucker breathed out slowly, and pulled the trigger.


	10. Med Bay. Again.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunions and talks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter you guys!!! I want to say a huge thanks to everyone that's been reading, i've really enjoyed writing it, and extra thanks to those of you that have been commenting =) I hope you enjoy this last chapter!

Tucker opened his eyes, and regretted it. The glaring lights of the med bay stung his eyes and sent his head spinning.

“Crap,” groaned Tucker, wishing fervently that he wasn’t conscious.

“Tucker?” someone whispered off to his side.

“No…” he whined, turning his head slightly to bury his face into the pillow.

“No, Tucker, shut up!” the voice whispered again. Tucker blearily opened his eyes again and, after a taking a moment to focus, recognized Grif staring down at him.

“Why, what’s going on?” Grif silently pointed to the end of the bed, Tucker raised his head slightly with a grunt and saw Caboose, fast asleep, head resting on the foot of the bed, “Ah.” he acknowledged the wisdom in keeping his voice down.

“I’m going to go get the others,” Grif raised himself up; patting Tucker on the head (or rather, face), which Tucker batted away clumsily with his left hand and a smile. He carefully sat himself up without disturbing Caboose as Grif jogged out of the door, shoulder twanging uncomfortably, but thanks to painkillers it wasn’t too bad. Tucker took the opportunity to take a look around.

Sarge was asleep on the other side of the ward, and directly across from Tucker was Donut. From what he could see it looked like he had a broken nose as well as numerous smaller injuries on his face, he was also sleeping. The bed directly to Tucker’s left was curtained off. Many of the other beds in the ward were filled with soldiers from the rescue teams, including Jensen, who waved merrily at him with the arm that wasn’t in a sling and mouthed _I got shot, too!_ while pointing to it in a far too cheerful manner. Tucker guessed she was on more pain meds than him. Everyone on the ward was quiet. _Grif probably had a word with them,_ he thought.

His stomach sank through the floor as it hit him that Palomo wouldn’t be residing in one of the beds, sleeping off his injuries. The memories were hazy, twisted with agonizing pain, but Tucker could vividly recall the image of Locus casually nudging the body on the floor. He took some comfort in knowing he’d avenged Palomo’s death, but the weight of it still hung on Tucker heavily.

At that moment, Grif returned, breaking Tucker from his thoughts. Behind him followed Simmons, who was tip-toing comically, Church, Kimball, Carolina and Felix.

“Congratulations on a successful mission, Captain Tucker.” said Kimball quietly and Tucker pushed away his thoughts of Palomo to give her a salute. She smiled and returned in kind.

“You know, your friends are like, annoyingly loyal,” Felix intoned, “ _That one_ has barely been out of the med bay for the last couple of days,” he said, gesturing at Grif. Grif blushed significantly.

“I have not!” he protested, “A-and in any case, I’m here to see Donut and Sarge as well. They are my friends too, you know.” Tucker raised his eyebrows and smiled, then caught Simmons’s eye.

“I bet that’s been annoying for you, buddy.” he joked.

“You’re damn right.” Simmons grumbled, then blushed as he realized what he’d said.

“Wait, wait, so you two are…?” said Church, pointing between the two of them.

“Way to go, idiot.” said Grif, smacking the back of Simmons’s head. Simmons looked as if he wanted to sink through the med bay floor.

“Yesh! Jeshie owes me ten dollarsh!” came a happy shout from Jensen’s bed.

Simmons practically wailed, and threw Tucker no more than a quick ‘See ya!’ before sprinting out of the room.

“I’ll go get him,” sighed Grif, obviously not affected in the slightest by their secret being revealed, “Later, man.” Kimball and Felix also made their excuses and left.

“You actually did good, Tucker,” said Carolina once they’d left.

“Ooh, such high praise from the lady!” said Tucker, only half-sarcastically. To his surprise, Carolina smiled.

“You should be proud of what you did.” Tucker was too surprised to respond. Carolina left with nothing more than a glance at Church.

“That was… odd,” Tucker said as Church sat himself down on the side of the bed.

“Yep,” was his reply, “But she’s right, you did really good.”

“Wow, if I knew a near-death experience would make you guys this nice to me I would have done it years ago!” said Tucker, hiding his happiness and pride at the comments.

“Speak for yourself,” mumbled Church, causing Tucker to realize just how painful laughing was, “Hey, can it.” Church nudged him good-naturedly.

“Sorry, dude.” Tucker held his aching ribs, guessing it must be from when he’d thrown himself and Wash onto the floor.

“Could you guys repeat the joke, I didn’t quite catch it?” came a voice from behind the curtain that, although croaky and weak, was still recognizable as Wash. Tucker’s heart leapt wildly in his chest and he tried to sit up a little straighter to peer at the next bed over. Church immediately saw the change in his expression and got up, swinging back the curtain before exiting the room with a small wave.

“Well, aren’t we a pair?” croaked Wash, smiling widely despite his stitched up lip.

“I thought I’d lost you.” Tucker blurted out, and immediately regretted it, his brain catching up to his mouth too late. He saw Wash’s eyes widen.

“You—uh—“ He mumbled, the pink blush staining his pale, freckled cheeks.

“Look, I—“ Tucker swallowed heavily. Well, no point in going back now, “I missed you. A lot. It’s been, uh, really difficult. Dealing with the thought of losing you.” Tucker couldn’t meet Wash’s eye.

“You haven’t lost me,” Wash replied softly. Tucker looked up and prepared himself to admit what he hadn’t even been able to admit to himself.

“The thought of losing you was so hard because, well,” _just do it, dumbass,_ “Well, because I hadn’t had the chance to tell you how I felt. About you, that is. If you… get what I mean?” Tucker’s heart was pulsing wildly and his stomach was in knots, his painkillers giving him just enough courage to overlook his nerves. Wash was silent for a long moment.

“I get what you mean, Tucker.” Tucker looked up, hopeful despite himself, “And, uh, me too.” Wash was glancing at Tucker, nervously, wringing his hands in his bed sheets. Tucker grinned so widely he felt his face ache. He wanted nothing more in that moment than to go over there and kiss the man on the other bed, but he was fairly sure neither of them were well enough to stand.

“Aww, you guys!” Wash and Tucker whipped around, both bright red. Donut was sat up in his bed, looking close to ecstatic, “That is sooo sweet!”

“Oh God…” muttered Wash, although Tucker noted he was still smiling.

“Yes, alright! Me and Simmons are dating, _can we drop this now_?” Grif exasperatedly told Simmon’s Lieutenant in the Pink armor, Jessie. She squealed and immediately ran over to Jensen’s bed, who jubilantly shouted ‘Ten dollarsh!’ when she saw her friend.

“WHAT?!” screeched Donut, who looked as if he was about to fangirl out of existence. Grif froze.

“Oh… no,” he said dejectedly, “Nooo, no, no…” he buried his face in his hands, pausing briefly to stick his middle finger up at Tucker who was laughing hysterically, despite the pain. The increased noise in the med bay and Tucker shaking the bed with his laughter caused Caboose to wake up and quickly come around.

“TUCKER!!” without wasting a moment, Caboose threw his arms around Tucker’s neck, which Tucker accepted, thankful that at least Caboose was aiming his hug around the bad shoulder.

“Hey, Caboose.” he said, allowing himself to be swept up in the madness occurring around him.

“Tucker I have been waiting for you to wake up for so long!! It’s been weeks!”

“Two days,” Grif’s muffled voice came from across the room.

“Yeeeears! And I have been waiting here the whole time and Church has been here too and also Grif! Everyone has been visiting, Tucker, oh you are so popular.” Tucker just laughed, waving as he noticed Evans, Lorne and who he assumed (judging by his height) was Caboose’s Lieutenant, none of them with armor on.

“I think I’m going to like it here!” Donut exclaimed, still beaming, “Hey there.” he directed at the tall Lieutenant, who, to Tucker’s surprise, blushed and replied with a small ‘hey’. Tucker turned to look at Wash.

“Glad to be back in this pile of crazy?” he asked, gesturing vaguely to Caboose, who was still talking rapidly, the girls across the room chattering and transferring money from apparently multiple bets, Grif in the middle of the room, still unable to move, and Donut smiling at the Lieutenant in a truly alarming fashion.  

“Oh, absolutely,” laughed Wash, “There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”

* * *

Five days later and Tucker was out and back in the training room, albeit he was only allowed to direct his troops, not join in the fighting, which he had grudgingly agreed to. A break had just been called, and Tucker watched the Lieutenants jog over to the mess hall after waiting for Jensen and Donut come down from their observation balcony to join them. The Captains, meanwhile, met down on the simulation floor. They always met after the practices to discuss how they’d gone, make suggestions for next time and, most importantly, bitch at each other.

This time, though, Carolina, Church, Sarge and Wash walked down to meet them. The four Captains turned to face them.

“Despite being forced into it, you make good leaders.” Church addressed them, obviously having prepared what they were going to say.

“But, we’ve decided we’re staying,” said Carolina, looking at Church. Church nodded.

“So we’d understand if you wanted us to take over leading the teams.” Church finished, the four of them nodding.

Tucker, Grif, Simmons and Caboose shared a few glances. Somehow, Tucker knew he’d been the one to speak. Yes, they’d been forced into being leaders without the experience that Church, Sarge or the two Freelancers had. Now they had the chance to give it up, go back to being followers again. Well.

“Church,” Tucker smiled, placing his good hand on his friend’s shoulder, “There’s no way in hell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Imagine "Contact" playing over that last scene =P Well, this was the last chapter guys! I really hope you enjoyed reading =)


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